About Bad Bosses and other demons…

It makes me feel sick to see how large companies are delivered into the hands of incompetent leaders, the direction of important departments to managers without commitment for their duties, by unethical and code less people who would be willing to do anything in order to achieve some numbers/results. I’m still trying to justify the meanings , to find a justification for them,… will take a while to find a good one

How they forget that their actions have an impact on the environment, on the lives of every person and situation involved, every action has an effect on society and the world,

We are too used to advertisements that are only a parody of the reality of the services that some companies today are offering, it is a filtered and making-up arrangement of promises to the people/customer that are rarely fulfilled or that do not exist, … cheating has become the daily bread of advertising delivered by service providers and media narrative and something similar is happening with the jobs and recruitment industry.. but that’s another subject .. let’s focus on leadership failures for now,,,on a negative note this time..

Obviously not everything or everyone can be perfect but we have to create balance, we have to be ethical and congruent as leaders ,extremely consistent and above all respectful…Respectful of the place and work environment, of colleagues and employees regardless of their positions.

Many of the bosses that I have known throughout my life, mine and other people leaders have a different style of management, some with the profile and adequate academic background that prepares them for it and others with the natural skills for the position, .. nevertheless an integral formation is required, ….and I would suggest that in their formation the following subjects are always include and mark as mandatory : principles of psychology, bioethics and human development

The mental state of our Leaders and their personalities will influence each action, each project, each undertaking, each result, their behaviors will have a positive or negative echo in the lives of all, at all levels: family, social, economic, academic , personal because : in every small actions the personalities are reflected, …. not even the most professional of the actors, or pathological liar can hide his true nature when it comes to leading a team, nobody can sustain a false image for a long time especially in times of crisis, and that is why it is necessary to be very methodical and cautious when selecting our bosses and employees if we are in a position to do so.

I have seen and felt hearts and dreams destroyed in the vilest way due to mistreatment at work, sarcasm, ridicule, insult, an orders badly given in a time of pressure or stress, but sometimes this will be taken easily and passes by only because it is the “boss” or a significant person who has «sinned».

After underestimating, pressuring, disrespecting, manipulating, and subjecting others there is no going back, words, looks, and actions are more dangerous than a weapon of mass destruction and have long-term repercussions …

workplace injuries are sometimes more painful than the wounds of Love …

Professional disappointments, frustrations and discontents can mark us for life, Sometimes, we have the opportunity to have wonderful business owners, but we have the misfortune of having disastrous heads of divisions, departments and therefore employees with a constant distortion of authority, direction and an eternal cognitive dissonance.

…. 🪔This is where I make a stop in the way of this short writing and. , … I answer to myself ,,,: precisely that is the heart of the matter ,, we all know it ,,,but few will speak it ,, few express it and do something to change the individual circumstances or those or their peers, few undertake small adventures and tasks that collaborate to a better ambience and work environment, or make their personalities wonderful source of strength , assertiveness and time management, balancing quality and quantity of daily tasks Vs. their results, but above all differentiating between what is expected and what must be delivered according to the job description. 🗝Service Vs Servility.

🚫it is under no circumstances admissible for a boss to tell you that he does not care if you sleep or not, if you do not rest, if you miss your son’s recital because it is the end of the month and you have to do some numbers,

It cannot be possible for a boss to give you an individual responsibility or task when you are connected by default and work-affection to a work team, and only ask you to deliver results when the process is involved him and your colleagues and you need their support so that other individuals collaborate and put energy towards the same goal, Can’t be correct for a Boss to gossip about employees and coworkers and to create division within a team, to undermine people and create toxic competitions.

Respect for the time and lives of other human beings is as important as results and productivity, when this is not understood and implemented the only possible result is chaos.

How many times do we get scared when we hear footsteps in the corridor of the office and we know that he is our department head or the bad and negative partner of the team?

when you want to stretch your arms and walk a little but once you turn around you find the supervisor stepping on your  heels? ,,then you realize that your paranoia is getting worse….

when you don’t have a peaceful night or a quiet weekend because there is always something unfinished that your boss wants it done or have updates on.  ?

How many have told me they get up in the morning and say to them selves: I’m lazy to go to work, …..want to throw my phone away, ….I just closed my FB or IG account , I don’t want to know about anything,,,,,,I fear answering calls or opening messages ……. and even have a panic attack when the phone ring and is the boss calling...

All are symptoms of a dysfunctional company, and a very disturbed mental state, ..those are dark fears and job traumas that turn into internal demons constantly stalking us.

Finally … today … reviewing the comments, arguments, hostilities experiences of my colleagues, patients and other acquaintances during the last years, months and recently the last weeks with more fervor and more in a high tone than ever, I can say and conclude, that more than trying to change «bad bosses» and directions or complaining about them and their abuses or mistakes, it is about being assertive with ourselves and towards others…..

Do not stay where you are suffering and most important stop contributing to chaos, start reinforcing your self and other people’s work with class , professionalism and ethics, stop gossiping and poisoning others’ environments and minds with comments and react in time to misuses of authority and toxic styles of leadership.

The organizational or cultural structure of a company is made up of the individualities of its employees who come together for a common good called vision and mission, are reinforced by integrity and commitment, maintained by ethics and respect, and become immune to disqualified managers if the system of work and camaraderie is healthy.

https://reba.global/content/what-does-a-mentally-healthy-company-look-like-here-are-10-essential-practicesIt all starts with ourselves, creating waves of change, … after all, bad bosses will never change, not because they are bad , it is because their nature is just that, there are no quantum leaps in personality and energy for an unconscious person, … But ,,, if we go a little further and apply a few group theories, principles of physics and chemistry, perhaps we can find the salvation table for our dysfunctional companies ,,, and that will be the topic of my next post……..

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Psychology of Customer Experience :

by Luz Betty

CX  is taking over and recently does it here in UAE in this society so demanding and eager for innovation, excellence and quality, it has been opening  the way through the business world in MENA region,  and UAE big companies won’t be the exception, but, For a real establishment of such important work, there must first be a greater understanding of what CX means, plus an evolution of customer service and hospitality that is currently being delivered by all companies in the world.

Cx in my humble opinion is the total humanization of customer service, but is not only about customers, it is about employees, is to approach individuals and consumers from their «emotional self», establishing connections that go beyond simple coo working, management and customer delight, understanding their motivations, their vital interactions and translating them into strategies for the promotion, profit and benefit of our companies regardless of the size, purpose or business model.

To CX applies very well the hermetic principle that says: “As above, so below, as within, so without, as the universe, so the soul…”Hermes Trismegistus

Depending on how our employees are treated so will be the experiences of our customers and vice versa, if the organizational culture within the company is positive all our customers will receive the same energy. Vibes don’t lie…   Obviously there are exceptions to the rule due to war of egos, powers, and other symptoms of -cultural unrest- leading to uncomfortable situations with customer service representatives. So I recommend that all consumer experience experts study human behavior, and our CS representatives have a high tolerance to frustration.

A person, a client, a case study,undefined

That person,  client or consumer with whom we speak, we interview and assist daily, is a human being that can be easily decoded, read, and understood through quantitative and qualitative tools that can be used as a master key to their experiences and allow us to anticipate to their moves, ideas, wishes and needs as well as to create such a deep link with our products and institutions that the customer have no choice but to continue and advocate for our brand and services, but to get to this we have to work in synergy within the organization a single link in the chain loose … and the organizational culture is lost therefore social trust , respect and loyalty from employees and clients.

My mentor asked me to write about CX once, last year to be more exact,  and gave me so many documents, information and tasks that honestly I have lost count,…but I can’t deny that I have enjoyed every single one…On this occasion Im writing based on 17 years of multiple interactions as a Psychologist and as a woman, with 10 years in the Middle East sailing the dunes of an extremely changing, diverse and multicultural society, and more recently dedicated and focused on CX part time in the fitness industry where I got the chance to talk and listen to thousands of people , survey some hundreds and track some dozen of journeys. A place where the existential motivators of our clients are as variants as the weather, their expectations are changing on daily basis and their lives direction make them arrive at our Port at different points of existence with dozens of expectations, emotions, feelings, needs and ideas as many as individuals join us looking forward to use our services and change their lives..

For us as CX representatives or Managers we must be lighthouses guiding their journey, sometimes god-parenting them, mentoring and supporting them on new beginnings,  being a psychiatrist on duty sometimes…    we become life strategists, advisors, new best friends or worst enemies  and so many other roles playing on daily basis, and this…this is precisely the ultimate reason why Customer Experience must be implemented and  should be promoted not only with our consumers but with our colleagues and managers, seeking the consistency of the department in and out the organization.

 I have learned and confirmed that Regardless of the company’s size, consolidating processes focused on our clients and their experiences are essential to the business and that we must always be Obsessed with excellence, Integrity and Organizational Culture.

Unity Vs Diversity: Multiculturalism

UAE is a country with infinite ranges of cultures and traditions, racial mixtures, intercultural unions and at the same time a nation under a faith and laws that are to be respected and followed and become the basis for those who come to this part of the world to work or start a family.

Each of our clients and potential ones are totally different, is a totally different world from one individual to another, obviously, and as clients theycreate and have their own expectations and ideas about our services, as CX representative I had to adapt and rethink my way of approaching each of them and breaking the ice and Emotional blockages that could affect our study, research and results, sitting with them become a pilgrimage to different lands in 8, 9, 10..hours of work….in the end,, is a journey that I really enjoy.

The moving dunes: Big Changes in short distances

Ways and manners vary from area to area, city to city, person to person…language and attitude must be adapted.  Assertiveness, congruence, image, tone of voice, the way we look at them and personal energy can build bridges or tear down the house. I learned a lot with the daily interactions during surveys and interviews, sometimes spontaneous conversations somewhere, but never in the same place or with privacy or conducted in an isolated area,  I had to be much more aware of what I was doing and talking, used smart body language and expressions,  , so that whoever saw that scenario as well as the receiver in front of me would perceive a positive or neutral vibe and get a concrete message with no gap for misinterpretation.

With all my experience dealing with people individuals and groups I can’t tell my Team and I are always victorious, some things go down badly, with rejection, mistreatment, manipulative speech etc…and other times it goes peacefully and lovely with a perfect experience to all parties involved, addressing clients and managing conflicting persons is not easy, but that’s the life and this is the human nature, changing like a dune in the desert.

All feedbacks are important….not all are valid but necessary to the final master piece

Every single person has something to say in this part of the world, and is natural to want attention and to feel we are somehow special and deserve a unique treatment.

Having hundred of valuable feedbacks positive and negative and some thousands that are less significant can provide loads of important information, is like a puzzle and all parts are required for the whole master piece.

I don’t disregard or discard the opinion of any of our clients or external contacts and as a CX coordinator I must assist and genuinely provide support as much as I can always, within the frame of Company’s Rules and policies that are not always to be liked by customers or employees but there must be someone to ensure they are being followed and implemented so we can create a perfect and controllable experience when required. Being soft and strong (wisely balanced) is the key.

Developing the ability to be soft and strong is truly an art. It is a gift, a talent, and a superpower. However, it takes a little longer for others to accept and understand because it is so different. People have a hard time comprehending that someone can be two seemingly opposite things at the same time. As humans, we are inclined to place people in either one category or another. https://medium.com/@hollykellums/the-art-of-being-soft-and-strong-

Patterns and Paths:

Universal patterns are everywhere, and everything has been created with number, measure and weight, that give us the opportunity to find patterns and similarities in the behaviors and opinions of our customers and everyone around us.

Obvious things can be seen by us during the time of the mystery shopper, but what really maintains consumer loyalty is hidden behind the obvious, analyzing those patterns I have found the answer to my CX research.

Customer Journey Piers

Each potential client-consumer arrives at a different point of their emotional journey but all of them must check in on a common point before joining the company or becoming a client.

And this is where we get to put them on track, retain them and make them loyal users for good or for bad, all depends of the business model of the organization and their priorities.

To make this a massive and productive commercial Pier the whole company have to speak CX and everyone must be aware of the Customer Journey and being familiar with consumer behavior,  a single person or independent department can’t make it on their own, all departments within the organization are necessary and important to the Customer Experience process.

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